Meet my friend Jennifer. Well, kind of. She’s the one in the blue shirt and white shorts, leading Skeeter the dog, with her arm around me.
I wish you could’ve been there that day. They say ” a picture paints a thousand words,” and that’s definitely true with this one. I’ll do my best to bring the story to you.
It was June of 2010. I’d just finished running my first 5k race at the 2nd Annual Freedom Run. I was two months from completing a year-long residential discipleship program, where God had totally flipped my life upside down. And I was 145 lbs. lighter, both physically and spiritually. I was no longer wearing the weight of the world on my shoulders. For the first time in my life, I truly understood freedom in Christ.
As we prepare to celebrate the Fourth of July, I can’t help but think about freedom in more ways than one. Tomorrow will bring fireworks, barbecues, and gratitude for living in a free country.
Oh.. but there’s so much more to freedom. The Webster’s 1828 Dictionary defines freedom as…
A state of exemption from the power or control of another; liberty; exemption from slavery, servitude or confinement.
9 months prior to that picture, I was sitting in the corner of my bathroom floor weeping, as my sweet friend Jennifer tried to put her arm around me and tell me there was a better way for me. Hours earlier I had expressed my desire to die. She knew I wasn’t playing around, so she took action. Action meant an intervention from people who loved me too much to watch me stay where I was.
I didn’t want to go. I was too gripped by fear. Everything in my life was about to change. I couldn’t wrap my head around the fact that God had bigger plans for me, because all I could see was the panic-painted picture before me – and that picture looked grim. That picture had no hope.
But my praying friend and mentor, Jennifer, could see the bigger picture for me. And that’s just what God does. He puts people in our lives who can help us see the bigger picture when we can’t focus on anything but the lack of hope in front of us. He puts people in our lives who will fight for us when we can’t fight for ourselves. He puts people in our lives who are willing to make us mad with bold truth, because they’re willing to lose a friendship over not trying to save our lives.
We all need at least one friend like that in our lives.
When Jennifer and my friend Jammie checked me into that residential program, they were holding my hand and putting their arms around me. But I wasn’t too happy about it. My whole life was about to change and I couldn’t see the bigger picture. I could only see the pain in front of me. To say I was mad was an understatement. But they did the hard stuff anyway, because Jesus calls us to do the hard stuff.
But God… He patiently waited for me to release the momentary pleasures of this world from the tight grip in my clenched fists so that He could place an understanding of freedom into the palms of my surrendered hands. It took a lot of digging into the dark, broken places of my beat-up heart to get me to that place of surrender, but Jesus is bigger than the darkness. He’s bigger than the broken places. It’s His love that brings surrender. Only His love. And His love brings freedom.
When I was 10 years old I was in a car accident and told I’d never walk again. Running was certainly never part of the bigger picture. By my early 20’s I weighed 330 lbs. I couldn’t walk up a set of stairs without losing my breath. Running was definitely never part of the bigger picture.
But spiritually… emotionally… mentally… all I’d ever done was run, run, run. Run from the pain. From the heartbreak. From the truth of God’s love for me. I was running, but never getting anywhere. That kind of running makes a person tired. I couldn’t see freedom and hope and peace in the bigger picture. I could only see the pain I was standing in. The pain I was trying desperately to run from.
I stepped behind the start line of that 5k race with the goal to run one-mile. I’d been preparing and all I wanted to accomplish was one-mile. But I didn’t make a mile. Instead, I ran 3.1 miles. Once I got started, I couldn’t stop. I hit the pavement and I knew this was bigger than me. I knew there was something on the other side of that finish line I’d never felt before.
I’d never followed through with anything in my life. I’d never finished anything. I’d never ran toward anything. I always ran from it. But that day.. That day you see in the picture… That day was different. That day I ran towards the finish line. And I crossed it. Victoriously. Freer than I’d ever been before.
And that day, my friend Jennifer stood by the finish line as I crossed, waiting to put her arm around me and celebrate. Because that’s what friends do. They put their arms around you in the darkest of days and they put their arms around you in the victories.
And isn’t that what Jesus does for us, too? He holds us in the darkest of days when we can’t see past that moment of pain, and He holds us in the victories, when we overcome the darkness.
But here’s the thing about Jesus… We have to let Him hold us. We have to invite Him into those darkest of days. He’ll never force us to make that choice. He’ll offer it over and over and over again, because He’s so patient, but never will He force us to invite Him into the darkness.
I don’t make many promises, but let me promise you this… When you invite Jesus into the darkest of places and ask Him to help set you free, He will ALWAYS, ALWAYS, ALWAYS show up and deliver on His promise to set you free. Because that’s who He is.
My friend, may I put my arm around you for a second and share something? You don’t have to keep running from life. You don’t have to keep running from the pain. Because the moment you stop running because you’re too friggin exhausted to keep going, it will all still be there, waiting to torment you.
What if you ran towards freedom? What if, as painful as it may be, you chose something different than what you’ve always chosen? What if, just for this very moment, you chose to let someone put their arm around you and walk with you through your journey?
Though I can’t physically put my arm around you and walk through life with you, I think I can help a little. I just opened enrollment for my online course The Basics of Freedom, and I would LOVE for you to join me as we dig deeper into what freedom in Christ looks like and how to get there.
The Basics of Freedom is a Biblical framework for those who long to be set free from the strongholds in their lives. Developed to help those seeking a deeper relationship with Jesus, it provides a Biblical, proven process for understanding true freedom in Christ and learning to live out the abundant lives God designed for us.
I would love to walk you through this process and help you cross the finish line of the race God designed for you to run. Freedom isn’t just for the elite, my friend. God created Freedom for everyone. Check it out and I hope to see you on the inside. Enrollment is only open for a limited time.
Here’s to crossing the finish line with you!