We’ve all been rejected at least once in our lives. If I could guess, I bet it’s been more than once.
photo credit: barbaracorcoran
Everyone handles rejection differently, and the way we handle it sets us up for success or failure. It’s up to us, really.
Barbara Corcoran, real estate mogul, business expert, and Shark Tank star, can teach us a thing or two about biting back at rejection and not allowing it to define us.
In 2008, Mark Burnett, producer of Shark Tank, Survivor, Dancing with the Stars, and a long list of other successful shows, contacted her about starring in the new show. Before she made it to the first meeting with Burnett, he changed his mind. His assistant called with the rejection saying, “We’ve changed our mind. We hired another woman.”
Ouch.
Objecting the Rejection
Corcoran had two choices: Hang up the phone and move on, simply facing the fact she had been rejected, or fight back. She chose the latter, sitting down and “banging out the best email I think I ever wrote in my life.” Here’s the letter:
Dear Mark,
I understand you asked another girl to dance instead of me. Although I appreciate being reserved as a fall-back, I’m much more accustomed to coming in first. But I consider your rejection a lucky charm, as everything good in my life happened on the heels of rejection. I do my best when my back’s against the wall. I’ve had all my big successes on the heels of rejection and frankly, it’s right up my alley. There was Sister Stella Marie in 5th grade who said I’d always be stupid because I couldn’t read. Then there was the New York old boy network trying to lock me out of their real estate fortunes, until I became their largest competitor. Then there was The Donald himself who wrongly swore in court I’d never see a penny of the $4m commission he owed me for saving his ass and making the largest land deal in the city’s history. And of course there was my ex-partner Ramone Simone who parted with the words, “You know you’ll never succeed without me!” I think you should consider inviting both women to compete for the seat.
As you know, Barbara won the seat, but she didn’t get it sitting down waiting.
Not Accepting Rejection Pays Off
Corcoran stood up for herself, knowing she was the girl for the job, letting others know as well. She took the advice of Jon Acuff before he even knew he would write the book Start and punched fear in the face.
She’s now invested in over 20 businesses on Shark Tank, changing the lives of other entrepreneurs with the same dreams she once had, then made reality.
Burnett Productions rejected three times more people, and only picked 25% of those. Barbara was the only one who objected to the rejection.
Rethinking Failure
How we handle rejection and failure will make us or break us. (Tweet that)
I’ve been rejected by publishers. Turned down by past companies I wanted to work for. Failed businesses. Rejected by men because I don’t fit the mold.
And. I. Keep. Going.
Rejection doesn’t define me. It doesn’t define Mrs. Corcoran. Why would you let it define you?
Take a stand for what you believe in. Don’t back down because someone tells you that you don’t have what it takes.
Punch rejection in the face.
What rejection do you need to object to today? Share in the comments.
Thank you for the encouragement.
Thanks Sandy.
Barbara did great! and she makes the show great as well!
Yes.. She’s one of my favs.
Couldn’t agree more – I can’t imagine if I had gotten everything I “thought” I wanted. I would not be where I am today. Thanks!
So glad I haven’t gotten everything I wanted, too, Sheri.
I definitely have been rejected a few times but I agree that it can be empowering. It was for me.
Me too, Beth. Once we get over the initial sting and move forward.
I may be posting this twice? I don’t know… anyway, great article! and wholeheartedly, rejection is a mean bugger! wish we all could feel better and not feel that sting so much! #letitgo and get over it! great job! p
Thanks, Patricia.
This is good!!! I am not one to sit around and accept rejection….unless…I truly feel in my gut that it wasn’t right for me in the first place. If it is, I am going after it!!!!!
You go girl! 🙂
Everyone gets rejected, sooner or later, and sometimes more than once…or twice. As you point out, it’s how you deal with it that’s important.
Indeed, Jackie.
So encouraging! I really love this. Thanks for sharing.
Thank you, Lacie. Glad it was encouraging for you.
Those rejections are sure hard to swallow, but what can result from them is the best part. I’ve had it a million times, but the goal is to keep fighting. It can be hard and disapointing, but what we do with it is what matters. Great post!
That’s right, Heather. What we do with it is what matters.
Love this! I’m no stranger to rejection. As an author I’m putting my work out there for publishers, reviews, readers, award committees…etc… to judge and accept or reject as their whims decide. Although I can’t often punch rejection in the face because it just isn’t professional (every reader is entitled to his/her own opinion!) I certainly don’t have to let it get me down. Instead, it is fuel for my fire 🙂
Love that attitude, Christine. I know how it feels to be rejected by publishers. My second book has been rejected more times than I can count, but I still keep going.
You may get rejected but that’s where I move on and don’t let it get you down. Something out there better for you. Thanks for sharing!
Indeed, Pam.
I remember not hearing back in a timeframe I was given after a series of interviews and tests so I called rather than thinking I wasn’t good enough. My persistence paid off too. 🙂
Love that, Patricia.
Totally agree! Rejection doesn’t define who we are as individuals. There is magic in all circumstances, and who knows, without them, we wouldn’t be able to experience all the joys and circumstances that we’re faced with today right 🙂
🙂