I saw it. The six-foot-wide circle of oak where legends have stood and where the legends-in-the-making dream about standing. But I didn’t just see it. No, I saw it from an angle I never dreamed would happen. I saw it from the back of the stage of the Grand Ole Opry, where those same legends walked. Excuse me while I still pinch myself.
I inched my way closer to the right as one of those legends took the stage and caught a glimpse of the circle. And I tried to remain calm and adult well. It was tough.
I saw the packed house in the crowd and thought to myself, they see the circle, too, but not like this. And at that moment, I was really glad I’d gone to the bathroom before showtime because the excitement and nerves would’ve made my bladder sing its own tune.
But I’m getting ahead of myself.
You see, I wasn’t supposed to be at the Opry that night. I’d made a quick trip to Nashville for a couple of meetings, a co-write, and a writer’s round. While scrolling through Instagram stories, I saw that Pam Tillis would be gracing the circle my last evening in Nashville. The next thing I know, my friend Cindy is saying things like, “We need to leave by 5:30. We’ll go to dinner first. Pam put our name on the guest list.”
Again, I tried to remain calm and not pee my pants. It’s fine. I’m fine. Everything’s fine. Or maybe it’s not. Perhaps I should get my bladder checked, or does that just come with age?
As we found our way to the parking lot, I was pretty sure Missouri could hear my heartbeat from there. I was about to meet Pam Tillis. As we walked through the Artist Entrance, I was trying to grasp the reality that hundreds of artists have walked that same way many times; George Jones, Merle Haggard, Loretta Lynn, Mel Tillis, and even my buddy Paul Harris of The Cleverly’s, most recently.
Be calm, Sundi Jo. Act cool. You’re fine. Smile. Breathe.
I repeated that in my head several times as we walked through the halls, and again after I looked to my left and there sat John Conlee in his dressing room. Oh, my grandma’s gonna freak!
Be calm, Sundi Jo. Act cool. You’re fine. Smile. Breathe.
And then there it was… the sign on the door reading, “Women of Country.” We walked in, and there she was, the one and only Pam Tillis strapping on a guitar and getting ready to warm up for her set with the band.
I sat on the couch and took a deep breath as I noticed I was surrounded by pictures on the wall of Women in Country staring back at me. Reba, Terri Clark, Minnie Pearl, Kitty Wells, Loretta, Tammy, and Jean Shepherd were there. And, of course, there was Dolly Parton.
Be calm, Sundi Jo. Act cool. You’re fine. Smile. Breathe.
And then there was music. And I sat in the dressing room, and tears started to well up as Pam rehearsed “Last Summer’s Wine.”
Ain’t it funny how memories/Grow sweeter with time/Here’s to you and me/And last summer’s wine.
This was really happening. Right. In. Front. Of. Me. And I tried to suck the tears back.
Be calm, Sundi Jo. Act cool. You’re fine. Smile. Breathe.
But you see, all that’s hard to do when what’s happening right in front of you aligns with your dreams and desires to create songs for a living. Pam isn’t just a singer. She’s an amazing songwriter. “Spilled Perfume” is one of my favorite songs. I love the emotion and the way the words flow together so well.
As a fan, it was so hard to wrap my mind around this moment, and as a songwriter, hearing the words come alive right before my very eyes moved me in a way that’s hard to describe. Music does that, ya know.
And then she broke into one of her dad’s songs, ya know, the legend Mel Tillis, and my heart melted for my beautiful friend Cindy. To me, Mel’s a Country Music icon. To Cindy, he was “daddy.” I know where my emotions were. I can’t imagine where hers were.
I love when God smiles on us just when we need it. Father’s Day had just passed. Cindy didn’t know Pam would sing one of his songs to honor him. Here I thought I was the one getting the cool gift, but God was loving on us both in different ways.
And then it was showtime, and we all got up and started walking toward the stage. Like, the stage? The Opry stage? Me? I’m going?
Be calm, Sundi Jo. Act cool. You’re fine. Smile. Breathe.
As Pam walked confidently, leading the path for the rest of us to get backstage, I was reminded of all those who’d walked before her, leading that same path. I was literally walking where legends had walked, and I was struggling so much to wrap my head around all of it. I hadn’t had time to prepare.
And as Pam was preparing to go on, rising artist and singer of “Huntin’ Season,” Mackenzie Carpenter, was walking off the stage after just making her Grand Ole Opry debut. I had just unexpectedly watched a dream come true for another artist. It was incredible!
And then I saw it… the circle.
And I watched Pam Tillis open with “When You Walk in the Room,” and I once again tried to grasp that this was my current reality. Then Cindy reached over and whispered, “Someday, someone will be singing your songs on that stage.” Prophetic words, I believe.
Be calm, Sundi Jo. Act cool. You’re fine. Smile. Breathe.
We walked back to the dressing room after the set, and that was it. The end. It was time for the band to pack up and go home. It was time for Pam to get ready for her next tour stop. And it was time for Cindy and me to head home so I could pack up and head back to Missouri the next day.
It was time to return to normal. But I don’t think it’s that easy. You see, some moments change your life, and there are moments that you just never come back from the same. This was that.
Was it because I walked where legends walked? Partly. Was it because I met Pam Tillis? Partly. Was it because I saw my sweet friend Cindy hear one of her dad’s songs sung in the circle? Partly. But it was also a reminder to me that my dreams and desire to be a professional songwriter are inches away from becoming a reality. It was a reminder to keep dreaming, pushing through the hard, and jumping over the rejections because a yes is coming.
Those women on the walls in the dressing room did the same. They dreamed. They did. They worked hard. They pushed through the rejections. And because of it, the world knows Terri Clark, Loretta Lynn, Dolly Parton, and of course, Pam Tillis.
I finally remembered to breathe when we got in the car, and as I write this, I’m still trying to grasp the reality of all of it – the reality of a girl’s dreams coming true. And the reality that I saw the circle.
Be calm, Sundi Jo. Act cool. You’re fine. Smile. Breathe.
