Dear Dolly,
Isn’t it amazing how God is always putting the puzzle pieces of this life together, and often times it takes years before we even see how the pieces connect? Let me tell you a story.
I was eight years old, sitting around the kitchen table during a weekend visit to my dad’s house. I heard this unfamiliar voice come on the radio, and within seconds, my life was forever changed.
The song was “Silver and Gold.” From the moment I heard that song I couldn’t get enough. My mom bought the cassette tape (for you friends younger than 25, google that) of “Eagle When She Flies” and I eventually wore it out. Actually, I’m listening to the CD as I write this. It’s still my favorite album of all time.
You see, both that song and your voice meant more to me then you’ll probably ever know. I listened to that song and read the lyrics a gazillion times, yet really had no idea what it meant. I hadn’t learned about Jesus yet, but I knew something was different when I heard that song. I knew I would be safe from the hurts of the world surrounding me.
By the time I was introduced to your music I had been sexually abused by multiple people. The smell of whiskey was a familiar scent in my life, as I had learned to mix my dad’s drinks by the time I was six. I longed for his acceptance, but often felt abandoned and convinced he loved alcohol more than me. My mom was working all the time to support us and had her own struggles. From a very early age, I felt completely alone in a big, scary world.
But there was something about your music. It helped me drown out the world. I was safe. If only for a moment. Safe from anyone hurting me. Safe from the pain of the world. Safe from the reality of fear that hovered over me. I grew up reading about you, watching you on television, and listening to your music. I would hear you talk about this God I didn’t know much about, and something inside me longed for that relationship you had with Him, even though I didn’t yet understand it.
Most of my life was spent running from something. Running from pain. I ran to food, alcohol, drugs, and relationships I didn’t belong in. Whatever would make the pain stop. Then, in 2006, I was introduced to Jesus. To the Jesus you had spent years singing about. The Jesus I sang about over and over again in “Silver and Gold.” I was introduced to the Savior you had been unknowingly teaching me about for years. My life hasn’t looked the same since.
In 2009, addiction took my father. I could no longer bury the sadness of my heart and I was at the end of myself. My life was unmanageable and I was spending every day just trying to survive. But God intervened, plucked me out of the world, and spent a year digging into the deepest parts of my brokeneness, healing the pain I’d spent so many years running from. For the first time in my life, I finally understood God’s love for me. That love you’d often talked about in your music. Grace. Mercy. Redemption. I finally understood it.
Years later, I’m still seeking and living in His grace, mercy, and redemption. And all these years later, I’m still walking through life with your music.
And here’s where another piece of the puzzle comes together. I’m the founder of Esther’s House of Redemption, a discipleship program, offering hope to women struggling with addiction, depression, the aftermath of physical and sexual abuse, suicide, and more. Because God is a God of redemption, I get to use my past as a pathway to offer hope to other hurting women. And you can bet they’ll be introduced to your music.
You taught me about Jesus when I was a little girl, even though none of us knew it at the time. You sang a song which unknowingly drew me near to our Savior. Of all the songs in the world, that would be the first I heard from Dolly Parton? Coincidence? I think not. God has His hand in everything and I love that about Him.
I want to say “Thank you.” Thank you for never giving up on your dreams, despite all those who laughed and opposed you. Thank you for writing “Silver and Gold.” Thank you for talking about Jesus, even when I didn’t know who He was. Thank you for being a safe place to run to when I didn’t know where else I could turn. Thank you for being you.
Someday I look forward to the opportunity to shake your hand and give my heartfelt appreciation for the wisdom you have shared with me. For teaching me about perseverance. For teaching me about dreaming dreams that are bigger than we could ever imagine. Your willingness to never give up will continue to change the generations after you, as I get the honor of pouring hope into other women seeking redemption.
I’ll be in Kansas City soon to see you in concert again. I’m hoping “Silver and Gold” makes the playlist. And someday, I hope to mark this item off my bucket list: Write a song with Dolly Parton.
Thanks for being you.
Sincerely,
Sundi Jo
Hi Sundi Jo,
Love your name! 🙂 And what’s even better ‘He knows your name’! That’s a song I know. 🙂 I slipped on over to your post after seeing your comment on Mary DeMuth’s page. What a testimony you have. A testimony to share with the hurting in this world, andgive them Hope and to help them heal. I know He will abundantly bless you for being obedient to His calling for your life. This is a great story about Dolly Parton. I know God can and will use anyone and anything to reach us! I love her singing too! I am a grandma now, and grew up listening to her. 🙂 I have her singing “He’s Alive” in my ‘favorites’ and listen to it often. It makes something well up in my soul something huge watching her sing that!
May our God richly bless you!
Susan
Susan,
Thank you so much for the kind words. Glad to hear from another Dolly fan. God bless you, too!
Hello Susan, Thank you for sharing your story, I do know where you are coming from, and have walked down that dark road myself, by the grace of God I am doing well today and free of sadness and live in the light, and Dolly Parton’s music Has always been a light in a other wise dark place, My Favorite is “Jesus and Gravity”, He is my Strength. so song rang so true… Thank you again … Gordon
Love that song as well, Gordon.
Oh this is just wonderful! Thank you for sharing it. Yes, I’ll post it on Facebook and tweet about it. I love Dolly! Our favorite Christmas album, that literally kicks off the Christmas season on the way home from Thanksgiving festivities (and not a moment before!) is Kenny Rogers and Dolly Parton’s Christmas to Remember. She’s awesome…and so are you. Bless you in all your doing. Beauty from Ashes!!
Thank you Elise. Love that album, too.
Great to read your story hear, Sundi Jo, and be reminded once again of God’s incredible redemption. Isn’t it amazing how he holds us in His hands through all the hurts we encounter – till we come running to HIm – and then He still holds us in His hands. Awesome. blessings, amy
Thank you so much, Amy. It is amazing how His hands are in everything. We serve an amazing God!
Hi Susan, Your story was very touching and I’m glad you found God. He’s been waiting for you. 🙂 We all have different paths and recently I have come back to my Catholic faith after 30 plus years. I still fall at times but I know our Lord is always there to pick us back up. I’m also a Dolly Parton fan and like her story telling songs. She’s a brilliant writer, down to earth, and a kind lady. I hope to meet her someday too.
May God Bless You.
David, Thanks. Glad to hear you’re growing in your faith.
Thank you for so openly sharing your story and your redemption. This is powerful stuff and I know you’ll be a shining light for others who are hurting.
Thank you.
I haven’t kept up on her music as much as you, but I grew up listening to her on dad’s radio and have always admired her strength, courage, and testimony. I’m glad she was there for you, and still love to hear your testimony of change and redemption. I hope you actually mailed this letter to Dolly. God works in mysterious ways. It might actually make it to her personally. You may even get a visit from her at Esther’s House. I believe God does have great things in store for you because of your willingness to share your past. I admire your strength and courage. I’m turning 60 this August. I wish so much that I had found my healing at your age. I wish I had found a Woodland Hills back then. But there were none. Just traditional religion and traditional counselors. Even though I was a Christian I was never able to find the freedom at that age that you have. I even wrote back then, but not with the depth that you write. You are truly blessed. And I am so happy for you! And praise God that you have these opportunities to do what I was not able to do.
P.S. God has given you wisdom beyond your years. I hope you know that. Use it wisely, my friend. Use wisdom wisely….odd statement. 🙂 lol Love you,