Have you recently used food as a way to protect yourself? Did it leave you feeling regret only moments after? You’re not alone, my friend.
I’ve been in the middle of some heavy, emotional things happening in my family right now. Because food is an easy go-to for me in difficult times, I’m on high alert of my actions.
On a particularly rough day this past weekend, I decided I wanted some Chinese food – a buffet. I was hungry and it was lunch time. Before I headed to the restaurant, I texted a friend to let her know I was considering Chinese. When I pulled into the parking lot, she texted me back with some great word of wisdom:
No buffet today, ok? Don’t emotionally eat.
Boom! She called me on it before I even realized I was about to emotionally eat. I had two choices in that moment. I could eat my way through sadness at the buffet, or I could make a healthier choice, which wouldn’t leave me with regret later.
In those few seconds, I had to consider the next right step, and whether I was going to take it or not.
I’m happy to say I pulled out of the parking lot and headed to Ruby Tuesday for a salad bar.
Avoid buffets when you’re emotional
Because food has been a struggle for me, I try to avoid buffets anyway. Why put yourself in the way of temptation on purpose? I’m not saying don’t ever enjoy a variety, just be careful.
When your emotions are already heightened, you’re not thinking clearly enough to make snap decisions. When you walk into a buffet full of variety and a dessert bar built for a city, you’re putting yourself at risk to meet some very bad enemies: regret and shame.
[Tweet “Never choose a buffet when you’re hungry and emotional. It’s a bad idea! “]
Hold yourself accountable to safe people
Do you have a friend you can talk to? One who knows you well enough to know what your next move probably is? Call her. Text her. Tell her what you’re struggling with and process through together what’s going on in your heart.
Sometimes they see things you can’t see in the midst of your struggles. My friend knew I would regret my decision within an hour of walking out of that Chinese restaurant. She loved me enough to help me walk away from that negative choice.
Get to the why behind the what
I made it through that day without regrets. Without the shame of giving into something I knew would hurt me later. It wasn’t the chinese food that was the problem. It was about what I was using the food to do.
That’s where we have to be aware of our “why” behind our “what.” Are you eating that cheeseburger because you’re hungry and want to enjoy a good burger, or are you using it as a drug to cover up what you don’t want to deal with in your heart? Are you enjoying chocolate because you love the taste of a nice piece of delectable chocolate, or is it a salve to your brokeness?
[Tweet “When we use food as an alternative to dealing with our issues, we’ll regret it every time. “]
It was lunch time and I was still hungry, but Ruby Tuesday’s was a much better option. I ordered the fish tacos and the salad bar, then wrapped up the fish tacos in a to-go box so I could have another meal later. The salad was delicious, satisfied my appetite, and I left with a heart a little stronger than it was an hour before.
Later that night, I allowed myself a mini concrete from the frozen custard joint. Not because I was emotional. Simply because I wanted to enjoy something sweet. As I ate it on the way home, I enjoyed the dessert. Why? Because I wasn’t using it as a coping mechanism. I was simply enjoying some vanilla custard with Butterfinger pieces. I woke up with no regret. No shame. Just victory over the day before.
This victory can be yours, too. All you have to do is focus on the next right step.
[reminder]What other steps can you take not mentioned to avoid the pitfalls of emotionally eating? [/reminder]
Very good recommendation!
Thanks so much.