We have good days and we have bad days. We have weaknesses and strengths. We have turbulence on this ride we call life. But in the midst of it all, I choose to keep joy. I choose to keep joy!
I stare at the tear stained words of Zephaniah 3:17 as I take a break from letting the crocodile tears flow as I grasp my Bible tightly in my arms. I just want to be close to Him. Right now my mind seems to be going at a pace too fast to focus on what God is trying to show me in His Word. All I can do at this moment is hold onto this book for dear life – it is my saving grace! The words may be blurred. My mind may be racing too fast, but if this is the only way I can feel Him near me at the moment, then that’s what I have to do.
I miss God. I’m missing Him terribly! It seems I don’t get as much time with Him as I used to. There were days in my schedule that one more Bible study was going to drive me nuts. One more ½ hour of prayer was going to put me to sleep. Now I’m striving to find the time to spend with him; looking for that quiet place for just five minutes to be with Him.
The Lord your God is with you, he is mighty to save. He will take great delight in you, he will quiet you with his love, he will rejoice over you with singing. – Zephaniah 3:17
He is quieting me with His love as I write this. What does that look like? I intended to come downstairs, open my Bible and just read. I was going to enjoy the quietness awaiting me. But that’s not what it looks like. The tears have stopped because my roommate has joined me. But He is still quieting me with His love. My Bible is next to me. My back propped up against three pillows. My feet dangle over the side of the bed. The fan blows on me. And sweet music plays in my ear. For right now this is my idea of stillness. I’ve looked forward to it all day.
My mind still hasn’t slowed down enough to bring the words together, but every so often I rub my fingers across the now dried pages just to touch it – to remind myself that I am still close to Him.
As my mind slows down His Word starts to come to me.
- The Lord is my strength and my song. – Exodus 15:2
- I have loved you with an everlasting love. – Jeremiah 31:3
- Trust in the Lord forever, for the Lord, the Lord, is the Rock eternal. – Isaiah 26:4
Tonight I have experienced some sadness. I’ve experienced anxiety. I’ve experienced fear. But my joy has still remained. Do you realize that you don’t always have to be happy and have a smile plastered on your face to have joy? I haven’t always known that. My joy remains because I know God loves me. He loves me when I’m crying out to Him. He loves me when I’m ignoring Him. He loves me when I get too busy. And He loves me when I coming running back to Him in desperation. He loves me – it’s that simple. Thank you Father!
“Shhhh,” He says. “Be still and know that I am God.”